Tough Horse

It's very hard when someone dies and you feel like where you are isn't where you want to be. My grandfather died two days ago and I keep getting flashbacks to him when I was a kid. He was always such an energetic and polite man, with so many talents and interests. When I found out he was sick, I was travelling and I wrote him some postcards, but I was going to get some paper and write him a letter when I got back. So I have the paper now, but I'm a bit late. It was a huge shock to my system when I found out. More so than when my grandmother died because I'd been told that the last time I saw her would be the last time I would see her again. I was prepared for it, and she was sick so long as well.

I see my grandfather doing Qi Gong in the garden with the nurses, or learning Russian at his desk, paying for the bill when we'd just been to an expensive Japanese restaurant. I was always in awe of him. The kind of awe that never depletes.

Emily's parents left today but she had the loan of the car for an extra 3 hours so we took it to MacDonalds and stuffed our faces. I ate a chicken nugget meal, a fillet of fish, a mcflurry and half an apple pie. This was after I'd just watched Supersize Me as well. But he made me feel good about eating it. I mean, I never eat it in Australia. And this is the 3rd visit to MacDonalds in Spain this year.